Though I haven’t been feeling that great this week, I’ve definitely tried harder to help others and be a servant to them. I loved seeing the surprise on their faces when they came home to a made bed or folded laundry. However, I didn’t do this to get praise, instead I did it to honor YHVH and His word.
It says in Galatians 5:13, “You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love.” This is the kind of servant I want to be. I don’t want to have the attitude of doing something just because I was asked and have to, instead, I want to do everything in love and with eagerness to do what is required.
Unfortunately, when it came to helping my dad with his live broadcasts this week, I was anything but graceful. He just knows how to push my buttons and I couldn’t take much more. I was easily angered and put up a fight with everything! I felt like I just wasn’t good enough and was letting him down, so I acted out instead of being poised (good word).
I do wish I would’ve reacted better, but when I had what seemed like lots of people telling me different things that I should’ve done or should do, I couldn’t take it any longer. I found myself wishing that people would realize I could speak for myself, instead of saying what they thought I was thinking. This week, though I was more servant-like, I was definitely not the kind of servant that would please the Master.
There’s still a lot of training needing to be done in order to get to the stage where I can make my Father proud. Unfortunately, when you’re not feeling good and being demanded of, things get difficult. My mom and I are really looking forward to having a week of peace now that everyone, including my dad, has flown away. Not that it hasn’t been enjoyable.
The week seems to have flown by again! I can’t remember all the things that went on but it definitely doesn’t feel like it’s been another seven days! There was so much more I probably could’ve done, or done better, but you can’t go through life thinking, “What if.”
During the live broadcasts, there was so much to do. I had to keep an eye on the monitors to see when my dad looked at another camera, at the same time as answering the live chat on YouTube! It was a lot for a girl to do simultaneously (good word!) and it showed when I made the funniest mistake ever!
So, as I went to answer another message on the chat, I must’ve accidentally hit a button, without realizing it, and my dad started moving down until he’d completely disappeared off the screen! I panicked and had no idea what I was to do, so I changed cameras and tried to fix my mistake.
Thankfully, this occurred close to the end so the whole broadcast wasn't a complete failure. However, I wasn’t able to fix my mistake since I didn’t know what had actually happened until we played it back. I laughed so hard when I saw my dad moving off the screen!
Along with being in control of the live broadcasts every night this week, there were some pleasant moments. Mom and I found a great new gelato place near my chiropractor, we got to tour the local college with a friend of Jackie’s, I got to eat fried ice cream, and I was able to walk to dogs in my grandparent's neighborhood.
Going to the chiropractor twice a week is a lot of commitment. It takes four hours altogether to drive there, have my appointment, get a snack and then drive home! Most of the day is gone by the time we get back, but at least I feel better. Each time I get my neck clicked, it feels looser and free. My headache’s pain level also seems to decrease, which allows me to do a couple extra things that I couldn’t before going.
Walking the dogs, for instance, has become something fun since I can’t always do it. My dogs and I all pile into the car and drive to my grandparent's house to have a visit and a nice stroll. I love their neighborhood because the walk is easier, my dogs have friends there and it’s a peaceful place to walk.
Something different happens each time I walk in my grandparent's village. I might have over six dogs following me, I might run into an acquaintance, or I might find boxes filled with interesting books! It’s like going on a treasure hunt, I never know what’s around the next bend!
Ice cream seemed to have been my go-to snack this week. When I went to my grandparents, I would steal some of their sorbet to help with my dry throat. After going to the chiropractor mom and I found a yummy gelato place. And, who can resist some amazing fried ice cream? ;) There’s just something so refreshing about eating something cold and tasty on a hot afternoon.
On Wednesday, I was hoping to go to Netanya to see Nathan and Izzy, but after a very busy morning, there was no way we were going to make it. During Jackie and Rowan's stay with us, Jackie had gotten in contact with an old friend who lives in Jerusalem. Jackie didn’t think she’d be able to see this friend on this trip, but after getting an email saying that the friend was coming to the Galilee, plans got organized and they were able to spend the morning together.
Jackie’s friend, Yael, was married to a well-known professor and after he died, she created a fund to build something in memory of his achievements and life. Turns out, the library that is located at the local engineering college was one of the buildings built in his honor. It is one of the most beautiful libraries I’ve ever seen! The wall facing the Sea of Galilee is completely glass so you can read your book while looking at the magnificent view!
It was a very interesting morning, but after having an extremely late night the night before, I was like a zombie as we walked around the campus. Though I was able to enjoy most of it, things took a turn when Jackie and Yael started getting busy and putting thoughts into my head. Turns out, the college also has media courses, so Yael took us to have a look at the facilities.
The entire time we were at the college, Jackie was looking at the possibility of me becoming a student there and Yael was telling my mom that I should skip the army and just enroll there. I didn’t mind their input, but it all got to be too much by the end of it. Between Jackie’s excitement and Yael’s options to help me, my brain started to feel like it was going to explode.
When I got home, I waited until Yael had finally left, then crawled back into bed. I didn’t stop sleeping the rest of that day. It was like I had been hit by a bus and I couldn’t get up!
Thursday started off better than Wednesday because I was able to sleep in and read my book, There You'll Find Me, for a couple hours. Then, we all squeezed into the car and drove to the Chinese restaurant in town. It was nice to spend time with my family and our guests for a scrummy lunch. Unfortunately, the restaurant was very noisy and I started going downhill.
After about an hour of sitting in the noisy room, I had to walk outside and sit away from everyone just to clear my head. If a family hadn’t come and sat near me, I probably would’ve fallen asleep with my drink in my hand.
That afternoon, I took a nap and woke up with a screaming migraine. The pain was extremely painful and I couldn’t get up from my bed. I felt like a disabled person and couldn’t move the rest of the night.
When I did leave my bed, I was very dizzy and couldn’t stay downstairs with everyone more than 15-20 minutes. It was definitely a difficult night, but then there was light at the end of the tunnel.
Feeling a little depressed with not being able to do anything, I asked Jeremy if he was free to talk. At first, I whispered my words since the pain was really bad, but after an hour my head started to clear. Like they say, laughter is the best medicine.
For me, I started to feel a release of pressure when I couldn’t stop laughing at the way Jem said Emu, which he pronounced e-moo. Haha. Even though it hurt, I think I laughed for over five minutes.
That night, I had the best sleep ever! There’s this really cool app I use called Sleep Cycle and it tells you the different levels of sleep you're in. That night I was in a deep sleep up until my alarm went off, the next morning!
Though my head was still really sore after my second chiropractor appointment this week, I still managed to walk the dogs. My mom’s been so busy with our guests and cleaning the house that it’s the least I could do. Another great thing about walking in my grandparent's village was that I was able to get my nan to come out of her house! This week, she started joining me on my walks, which I really liked. It was such a joy to spend time with her, especially because I may not be seeing my grandparents for almost six months, in a minute!
Today, my grandparents left to go back to England for six weeks since they can’t take the heat of the summer here. It’s funny, because they’re just leaving when it’s going to cool down, but they do need a break. I’m excited for them to spend time with their friends and family for a month, but it’s sad that when they get back there’s a high chance I won’t be here since I’m hopefully flying to the States!
As this new week rolls in, I’m praying that YHVH will give my mom and I rest. We’ll have a nice quiet house for just over a week before a large group of people comes to stay! I’m really excited for those guests to arrive because they are like my family, but I could definitely use some peace first. Tune in to find out the shenanigans we get up to in the next couple of weeks. ;)
Though the lesson of this week was learning to be a servant, the theme was hearing YHVH’s voice. I’m still having trouble knowing if it’s Him I’m hearing or just my inner voice answering my questions. I would really love to know how to distinguish the two, but I have yet to hear a good answer from someone when I ask.
I also learned this week that I’m afraid of being healed. I’m scared what it would mean for my future if I were to be healed, but I’m done being afraid! I really want to let it go and let YHVH lead the way. There are so many unanswered questions that I’m nervous to see what will come if I no longer have any more headaches and neck pains. Because I’ve lived like this for almost six years, I no longer remember what it’s like to live without them. I’m just praying that my fear will go away and get off my back! It’s time to allow YHVH to work through me and trust that He know’s what He’s doing!
John 12:26, “If anyone serves Me, let him follow Me. And where I am, there My servant also shall be. If anyone serves Me, the Father shall value him.”