After the outreach ended on Saturday night, nothing was the same. I don’t think a single person left feelings like the same person they were when they arrived. Everywhere I look now, I find myself praying for God to show me the people who need prayer or a laugh. Even though the outreach ended, for those involved, it was just the beginning.
Bethany and I spent the afternoon chilling on the couch before leaving to go to Rebekah’s house at four o’clock. That night was Rebekah’s woman’s Bible study. We decided to get there early because Bekah was stressing about how messy her house was.
Upon arrival, we started chatting while helping Bekah fold laundry. It was great spending time with both Bekah and Bethany! I really enjoyed getting to know Bekah on this trip because we didn’t have much of a chance to talk last year.
By seven o’clock Kelly arrived to the party! I was so excited to see her, I ran to hug her as soon as she walked through the front door. There was one other lady who joined us for the Bible study, she was really cool and spunky. I would definitely say that the right people were present for the events that took place that night.
So much occurred once our small talk ended and we started to talk about God and His Word. As Kelly started to pour her heart out to us, I could see the walls around her collapsing. It was an incredible thing to watch, but also heartbreaking to hear what she had gone through in her childhood.
Bullied in school, Kelly was hurt and had a lot of bitterness in her heart that she wanted to get rid of. After telling us the root of all her unforgiveness, towards herself and God, Bethany asked if she would like to get rid of it altogether. When Kelly said yes, we left the room so she could have peace while she wrote all the things she wanted to let go of, on a piece of paper.
This took a good 15-20 minutes, but when she was done there was no hesitation in her eyes to complete the next task, which was to burn the paper. We all followed Bekah into her yard and stood around Kelly. Before we set the paper on fire, we asked Kelly to tell us everything she was hearing. I have never heard a person hear the voice of Satan so clearly and was shocked at the words that were coming out of Kelly’s mouth.
Satan made his last attempt to tell Kelly that what she was doing was weak, that choosing to follow Yeshua was a mistake and that she was cheating by choosing this path. But like my dad always says, “The great thing about listening to the Holy Spirit is that you get to cheat!”
After hearing enough of Satan’s lying words, we asked Kelly if she wanted to rededicate her life to Jesus and to have a die-to-self moment. Almost instantly she started praying the most wonderful prayer I have ever heard. She declared that she didn’t want to be bitter anymore, that she wanted to feel free and no longer wanted to hear Satan’s voice!
I didn’t want her to stop praying, but when she did the paper was lit and all the unforgiveness and pain was taken with it! When the paper was completely burnt, Kelly cried and said that she felt free! It was an incredible moment, but it was only about to get better.
Before going inside, Bethany asked why Kelly had gone to the park that day. When we had spoken to her, she had told us that she wanted to enjoy the beautiful day after being in church, but that wasn’t the full story. Turns out, that day, Kelly was thinking about killing herself! She was done living in this world where there was so much hate. She no longer wanted to be haunted by her past and figured the only way to do that was to kill herself.
This was my breaking point! I’m terrible when it comes to crying at the right times, but right there I shed a few tears. I don’t want to imagine what might’ve happened if Rebekah, Crystal, and I hadn’t been walking around the same corner Kelly was that Sunday afternoon. It truly is amazing how the Father shows us He loves and cares for us! When Kelly was hitting her breaking point, YHVH sent us to talk to her and pray with her! I will never forget that moment for the rest of my life!
Sarah arrived around this time, which was YHVH’s perfecting timing. She had gone through some of the same things as Kelly, and had been delivered from it all during the outreach last weekend! I was so happy Sarah was able to be a part of that moment with us, but it wasn’t over yet!
When we went inside, we started to pray over Kelly. The Spirit’s presence was so strong and every word that came out of our mouths were from Him. We all declared peace and love over Kelly, she had just taken a big step and her life was never going to be the same again!
As the prayer ended, Kelly said that she had seen a small candle and as she watched the flame and its light grew bigger and bigger until all she saw was bright light! We knew the Spirit was now in her, so we started praying that she would be given the gift of Tongues. It didn’t come at that time, but I truly believe she will receive that gift while she’s alone with God.
When our prayer ended and we looked at Kelly, we were not looking at the same girl! Her beauty was radiant and there was a light sparking off of her that made me want to hug her and smile! I have never seen someone transform like that! This just goes to show that when we have the Spirit living in us, we really do shine like a light!
It was sad when the night ended, but I made sure to get Kelly’s email address so we can keep in contact. I can’t wait to see her again and will continue to pray for her growth as she enters into a new dimension. I look forward to the day where she’s fellowshipping with us at The Vineyard and dancing with the girls during worship!
During the time of restoration in Kelly’s life, I was finding it hard to give my full attention to everything happening because I was feeling weighted down with something. As Bethany and I drove home, I knew there was one last unfinished business I needed to take care of before I traveled home. I didn’t know how it was going to come together but I decided that it was time to be bold and write to the person I needed closure with.
I’m not gonna lie, I was really nervous at sending my fiery text to Jackson, but it felt right. I wrote, “Are we ever going to talk about the elephant in the room because I’m getting fed up with you avoiding me like the plague in person and then liking my posts on Facebook?!” I know it was bold, but I was done playing games!
Jackson and I met at The Vineyard the following day, after getting permission from my dad, and we had a good heart-to-heart conversation. Yes, it was kind of awkward, but I knew I wouldn’t forgive myself if I didn’t get peace and closure.
I was actually quite shocked at the difference between my heart-to-heart conversation with Jem versus my heart-to-heart with Jackson. With Jem, there was definitely more maturity, while with Jackson there were a lot of “I don’t know's.” It was frustrating and by the end of our conversation, I knew it wasn’t going anywhere, but I got the closure I needed.
After praying together, Jackson and I parted ways. He didn’t even say goodbye when he left, but I feel like that was necessary to show me where we now stand. At first, I was sad about losing a friend, but then YHVH’s peace came over me which made me know that it was the mature thing to do. I could now end my trip knowing that everything that all the things that needed to take place did.
Driving to the airport was definitely bittersweet. I didn’t want to leave. In fact, the entire time we were waiting for our bags to be allowed through, I was praying there would be a way to stay longer. But alas, there was no way out of getting on that plane and flying home.
As we boarded our flight, I knew I had left a piece of my heart in the States. I felt no excitement to the fact that I was about to be reunited with my family and my very comfy bed, instead I felt numb. I’m not exactly sure why that is, I’m currently praying about it, but I hope that it will go away once things go back to normal.
The whole trip seems like a fairytale right now, like it never even happened. I can’t believe I was in another country just the other day! Things are definitely going to be different from here on out, I’m just praying that it will be a good different.
My prayer for this week is that we get the answers we need from the army, my job, and the person who’s car I hit. There’s going to be a lot of decision making being done, so I’m praying for strength to tackle all the obstacles that come my way. I want YHVH’s Will to be done in my life, so I’m also praying for peace over all these decisions because it’s not about what I want, but about what He wants.
1 Peter 5:7, “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in YHVH with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”